Thursday, February 26, 2015

Motherhood musings

I read this encouraging blog post about the trials of motherhood. I especially liked this "God doesn’t command us to enjoy the challenges of motherhood, but he wants us to find joy in the midst of mothering. Our heavenly Father scatters his goodness and mercies throughout the most difficult of mothering days (Ps. 23:6)."

So often I think I must be the only mother in the world who struggles with this. The exhaustion, the feeling constantly behind and overwhelmed. Just a morning scroll through Instagram can show me that other mothers are enjoying a homemade breakfast with their kids or a lovely stroll through a park while I've had the girls in the bathtub for 45 minutes just so I can keep the mess contained. Not exactly a Kodak moment. Everywhere there are beautifully designed, clean houses. Beautiful, dressed, clean children. Beautiful, put-together, clean mothers.

I do what I can to be realistic in what I share with the world but sometimes I fall into the trap of wanting to be the one with the beautiful moment perfectly captured that everyone else is in awe of. And then the Lord humbles me. Throw in a toddler tantrum or a baby in a walker who just emptied a bag of tortilla chips and then rolled over them and I'm put in my place -- under His grace. Constantly in need of His grace, really.

I find it encouraging though... I'm not commanded to enjoy the struggles. God doesn't want us to be some hypocritical, masochistic followers. He wants us to FIND the joy in the trials. Find the blessings that He showers on us. Find the moments where your babies curl up in your lap and are still for 10 minutes while you read a story and you realize, it's fleeting. You don't have to enjoy cleaning up spilled cereal for the umpteenth time but you do have to be joyful that God has given you a healthy toddler who can make messes, or a job for your husband so he can provide simple luxuries like cereal and milk, or a home that you can maintain and make a welcoming place for your family.

The other day Brian got home after working a 20-hour day and the first thing he noticed was that I had cleaned. It wasn't much, just generally tidying up and making sure there weren't toy booby traps all over the floor. But the point is that I think I set this really high standard for myself and I'm trying to impress all the moms of the internet instead of just doing what I need to, to take care of my own family and their needs.

I don't know if this post really has a point. I'm just spilling my heart right now. I was overwhelmed and then reminded that God gives us enough grace for today. He is good. He is merciful. I have to remember that when I'm doing the small, tedious tasks that make me want to run screaming from the house.

And in case you haven't seen this, totally accurate in this house.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015


What he says: These work pants are fine.
What I say: Those pants are literally hanging on by threads. You look like you're modeling a prototype for a new line of men's denim lingerie.

What they say: Easy 15 minute workout that you can do at home!
What I say: Easy for someone who is in shape. Realistically? You'll be huffing and puffing and cramping in the first 30 seconds.

What he says: High heels are dumb.
What I say: High heels are a necessary evil and these are the only shoes that match this dress so I HAVE to wear them.
What I say 20 minutes later: High heels are dumb.
What he says: What did you say?

What they say: Clean your whole house in just 15 minutes a day.
What Allie says: NOPE.

What they say: Dress nice when you go out in public.

What I say: Let's put the girls to sleep in the same room.
What Maddie says: NOPE.

Monday, February 2, 2015

Manic Monday

  • We finally installed the toilet in the second bathroom this weekend. And by we, I mean Brian and his brother. It's so nice to have 2 toilets again. I'll just leave it at that. 
  • Something possessed me to make a chocolate cake with chocolate pudding frosting and chocolate chips on top this weekend. I'm not sure what it was but I better exercise to exorcise that demon. Ha. Get it? Because it... possessed... Okay, fine it was a lame pun. I couldn't stop myself from typing it though. And even now that I re-read it, I chuckled to myself. BECAUSE IT'S FUNNY AND YOU KNOW IT.
  • Brian would have a crushed look on his face if he read that. Like "my wife has reached a level of corniness that I can't even comprehend..." Poor guy. Sometimes I almost start to feel bad for him but then I remember that he knew what he was getting into so it's his own fault.
  • We leave on Friday to visit So Cal again. Whoo HOO! I'm pretty excited to visit family although those party poopers didn't want to go to Disneyland. It's like we're not even related. Well, my older sister wanted to go but 2 against the rest of the fam isn't exactly great odds.
  • We deep cleaned the house this weekend. It felt so good to be clearing out all the germs from the past few weeks of sickness. Brian even cleared out some of his tools. Our living room looks sorta empty now. 
  • Next thing on the house to-do list: the floors! The floors! The FLOOOORRRSSSS!!! No more cold concrete. No more ugly gouges from the carpet tacks. No more taped cardboard in the hallway where the pretty flooring ends. No more spilling whatever we want on the floor. Hmm. Not sure I like that last one. 
  • It's Monday! I'm going to go walk/run on the treadmill. And then polish off the rest of that cake. I mean... Eat some celery and stuff.