But enough about me. Let's talk about something fun that I was just thinking about last night.
- Time it takes to watch a 2 hour movie: 2 hours
- Saturday nights: Go out to dinner, maybe catch a movie, relax at home with some dessert before calling it a night around midnight.
- Shopping: Grab your purse, head to the mall. Browse for a few hours, taking your time to try things on, before making a few purchases and finally coming home, happy that you got what you came for.
- Spare time: craft, bake, crochet, exercise (because you have a gym membership, of course), watch TV/movies, read blogs, keep up with the world
- Time it takes to watch a 2 hour movie: 3.5 hours pausing for potty breaks, rewinding to hear what happened because you can't hear over the toddler/baby chatter, pausing to get snacks every 10 minutes
- Saturday nights: Pile everyone in the car to get pizza, after 45 minutes, arrive home with pizza, find the latest Tinkerbell movie on Netflix, watch until kid's bedtime, clean up pizza off the kid, high-chair, floor. Bath kids, pj's on, brush teeth, put kids to bed, try to watch a grown-up movie but end up falling asleep on the couch. At 8:45 pm. Forget about dessert.
- Shopping: Load up the diaper bag (including diapers, extra outfits, snacks, sippy cup), purse (make sure you have extra wipes in there), stroller (don't forget the 2nd seat attachment), and kids. Drive to the mall. Unload and set-up stroller, get everything into the stroller (including children) and set off. Hit up Nordstroms first to see the fish and get a free balloon. Stop at the bathrooms for toddler potty break and baby nursing session. Finally head to the stores you want. Quickly browse, grabbing several things to try on. Head to the dressing room and try things on for 30 seconds. Spend 5 minutes trying to keep your toddler from opening the door and flashing the dressing room attendants your stretch marks. Spend 10 minutes trying to calm fussy baby. Second nursing session. Leave the dressing room with nothing you want because everything you grabbed was the wrong size and you're too tired to try again. Head to the Disney store and spend the rest of the time recuperating while your toddler watches cartoons. Decide you've had enough shopping for the year and head home. When the kids inevitably fall asleep in the car, sit there and do some online shopping on your phone and give thanks to God that such an option exists.
- Spare time: Sleep.
Yep. That's parenting. Only for the masochists.