Monday, November 24, 2014

Let's catch up and remember life.

Let me just recap the past few weeks... We went to L.A., tons of fun, came home and were attacked by the flu (despite Brian being forced to get the flu shot 2 weeks earlier), I was the last man standing so pretty thankful I felt good enough to take care of everyone. Finished the bathroom floor (finally),  gearing up for Thanksgiving, my sister coming to visit, and more work on the bathroom.


But enough about me. Let's talk about something fun that I was just thinking about last night.

Before kids
  • Time it takes to watch a 2 hour movie: 2 hours 
  • Saturday nights: Go out to dinner, maybe catch a movie, relax at home with some dessert before calling it a night around midnight.
  • Shopping: Grab your purse, head to the mall. Browse for a few hours, taking your time to try things on, before making a few purchases and finally coming home, happy that you got what you came for. 
  • Spare time: craft, bake, crochet, exercise (because you have a gym membership, of course), watch TV/movies, read blogs, keep up with the world
After kids
  • Time it takes to watch a 2 hour movie: 3.5 hours pausing for potty breaks, rewinding to hear what happened because you can't hear over the toddler/baby chatter, pausing to get snacks every 10 minutes
  • Saturday nights: Pile everyone in the car to get pizza, after 45 minutes, arrive home with pizza, find the latest Tinkerbell movie on Netflix, watch until kid's bedtime, clean up pizza off the kid, high-chair, floor. Bath kids, pj's on, brush teeth, put kids to bed, try to watch a grown-up movie but end up falling asleep on the couch. At 8:45 pm. Forget about dessert.
  • Shopping: Load up the diaper bag (including diapers, extra outfits, snacks, sippy cup), purse (make sure you have extra wipes in there), stroller (don't forget the 2nd seat attachment), and kids. Drive to the mall. Unload and set-up stroller, get everything into the stroller (including children) and set off. Hit up Nordstroms first to see the fish and get a free balloon. Stop at the bathrooms for toddler potty break and baby nursing session. Finally head to the stores you want. Quickly browse, grabbing several things to try on. Head to the dressing room and try things on for 30 seconds. Spend 5 minutes trying to keep your toddler from opening the door and flashing the dressing room attendants your stretch marks. Spend 10 minutes trying to calm fussy baby. Second nursing session. Leave the dressing room with nothing you want because everything you grabbed was the wrong size and you're too tired to try again. Head to the Disney store and spend the rest of the time recuperating while your toddler watches cartoons. Decide you've had enough shopping for the year and head home. When the kids inevitably fall asleep in the car, sit there and do some online shopping on your phone and give thanks to God that such an option exists.
  • Spare time: Sleep. 
Then when Brian watches the girls and I head out on my own, it feels like a vacation. "You mean I get to browse Target without worrying about keeping Allie preoccupied or making sure she doesn't grab everything off the shelves? Yes please!" And then I miss them. "Aww what a nice display of Christmas ornaments. If Allie were here, they'd be on the floor. I should bring her. She'd love it."

Yep. That's parenting. Only for the masochists.