No, I'm not pregnant. Yes, I titled this post pregnancy plight because I'm mourning over the fact that I'm not pregnant for COMPLETELY selfish and vain reasons. You should probably know that I'm selfish and vain if you haven't already gleaned that from reading my blog.
The only reason I want to be pregnant, is so I have an excuse to wear maternity clothes. Yes, roll your eyes. I am that ridiculous.
I'm sure you've already read my ode to maternity stretchy pants and my love for Old Navy's collection of maternity clothes.
Well here it goes again.
I happened over to Old Navy's website after I had a scare this weekend. Not a pregnancy scare, I mean, I drove past the old Old Navy store and it was GONE.
I was scared. I panicked. I cried. I was emotional and unreasonable. I asked my husband to immediately take me to the next nearest Old Navy 15 minutes away to make sure I hadn't been abandoned completely. He said no.
The next day, we wandered over to Michael's to get some artsy, craftsy stuff. Michael's is next to Best Buy and as long as my husband can check out cool electronic stuff next door, I'm free to shop at Michael's as long as I want. In fact, I'm usually the one who has to drag him out of Best Buy... it should be the other way around. But he's a shop-a-holic like that.
So we pull into the driveway of Michael's/Best Buy and there it was... that wonderful, blue, all-caps, Arial font sign: OLD NAVY!!! It had just been moved right next to Michael's!!! Unfortunately, they're still putting up shelves and stuff so it wasn't open just yet but a wave of relief washed over me and all was right in the world again.
To overcome my scare of having to live without such a staple as Old Navy, I decided to do some online window shopping. And yes, I ended up in the maternity section. But really, Old Navy?!?!? Come on!!! Must we all have babies growing in our bellies to benefit from whomever selects your maternity collection?!?!
A few other things: your maternity mannequinns look like me after I've eaten too much and yes, I would like you to start a new line of stretchy waist jeans for non-pregnant woman.
Here's a few picks from their maternity collection and their regular clothes collection... Now if I can just convince my husband that we should have kids so I can get a new wardrobe.
Did I really just type that?
Lord help my soul.